Foodformation

If you were to look in my refrigerator right now, this is what you'd see.

Sad, isn't it.

I don't even have any beer in there.

And, I've been to the grocery store two times.

I have no idea what all that stuff is on the top shelf. I mean, I know it contains grains and dried berries and stuff, but those items are so old. We're talking years. It's a waste dump of forgotten ethnic food ingredients. They just sit there day in and day out, all the time I'm in Rome, in the darkness. But, they seem happy so I leave them alone.

The middle shelf contains recent purchases, hummus, and fat-free cottage cheese (my friend gave me the soy creamer), but I wonder what I was thinking when I put the cottage cheese and hummus in my cart. I don't like cottage cheese.

Now we come to the bottom shelf. The pasture where the lone cauliflower roams. It's actually kinda cute down there. When I bought it I remember thinking, cauliflower good, me want, me take, ugh ugh. I was indulging my inner neanderthal.

There is a certain "whiteness" about my food choices and I guess it's good to have a theme. The color symbolizes light; signifies purity; joy and glory. It's also the color of the truce flag.

I give up.

I need my inspiration, my cooking muse. I need The Man.

Which leads me to think that without The Man I wouldn't need a kitchen. I could store my cauliflower in the cellar, then turn the kitchen into a large shoe closet or something.